Marriage

Went to see Sahara with Shambavi this afternoon and shopped, which I was not supposed to since Alex and I are moving to a new apartment and we need money to cover the moving expenses and the rent. But what do you expect a girl to do in the mall?

In a tiny little city like this one I am living in, you can't find a pair of shoes that you like. I have the exact right pairs shoes I want in my mind, but it seems I can never find them.

Put on so much fat during the summer, and everyone's perfect body in the movie is the constant reminder of my ever-expanding butt size. But very proud of myself tonight for not eating after supper.

Talked about age with Shambavi on the way home. I said many people of my age already had a career and might be promoted many times already and I would only be a newly graduate in the summer. Feiber, 22 years old, who is commonly known as the smartest student in the faculty, has already been married for almost 3 years and is graduating at the end of the year. Shambavi replied that his life is over since there is not much to expect anymore. I felt better. :)

Then we start to talk about our parents. I don't think my parents ever had sex after I was conceived, since they don't seem to love each other much. She starts to laugh and tells me that in India nobody talks about sex, even married couple. People gives an impression that no one is having sex and all the mothers are Virgin Mary, while India has the largest population. I couldn't stop laughing. She is so funny.

Where is my marriage going? Alex knows that he loves me much more than I does him. The fact is, I don't even know if I love him or not. But he is so devoted, and is not missing any of the charactors a wife would expect a husband to have. I want to love him more but why can't I?! So bored.

Feiber said he loves his wife. I saw her in the party and found her very nice. Then why does he want to cheat on her? Is it common in France to have affaires, as I was told?